The real defining image of this presidency should be the bank statement of the average American citizen
Shockingly, inexplicably, Donald Trump keeps finding new places to put his face. Also, his name. Or initials. Or one of those drawings a turkey a kid does by tracing the outline of their hand. He’s got his ballroom, the Kennedy Center, and a proposed 250ft arch that would become one of the tallest buildings in all of Washington DC – a city with longstanding height restrictions for development. His signature will be on US dollars later this year, in a first for a sitting president. I’d ask if he was getting tired of all the attention, but I think we know the answer to that. Up next is a commemorative gold coin – worth exactly $1 – featuring Trump’s scowling visage looming menacingly over the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office.
It’s a pretty classic Trump pose, designed to make a nearly-80-year-old man with a variety of mystery bruises who eats McDonald’s on a regular basis look physically intimidating. Beyond the president sporting a classic gen Z pout, the Commission of Fine Arts (a panel appointed by You Know Who) recommended this coin be “as large as possible”, which immediately makes me think of the giant penny Bruce Wayne keeps in the Batcave. Good luck trying to feed a parking meter with that.
Dave Schilling is a Los Angeles-based writer and humorist
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